The Chaos Club
For the Most Iconic (and Suspicious 🕵️) Pet Personalities
Submitted & voted for by our Community,
Dog Watch 🕵️
A tribute to the dramatic sighers, the furniture tyrants, the bath-time revenge plotters, and the passive-aggressive side-eyers who make our lives so beautifully chaotic.
There might be a tiny hooman trapped inside your dog.
Get suspicious 🕵️.
⚠️ Warning! Highly suspicious, conspiratorial evidence below
The Chaos Club
For the Most Iconic (and Suspicious) Pet Personalities
Submitted & voted for by our Community, Dog Watch 🕵️.
A tribute to the dramatic sighers, the furniture tyrants, the bath-time revenge plotters, and the passive-aggressive side-eyers who make our lives so beautifully chaotic.
There might be a tiny hooman trapped inside your dog.
Get suspicious.
⚠️ Warning! Highly suspicious, conspiratorial evidence below
Top Suspect of the Month:
Mabel
Age: 2
Charges: Selective Hearing
Mabel is medically deaf. Her owners know this because they've tried EVERYTHING to teach her the basic commands.
"Sit" - *blinks awkwardly*.
"Come" - *not even a side eye of acknowledgment*
"Leave it" - *like you don't even exist*
What’s weird is apparently she's learnt to feel the... vibrations.... in the air instead?
Like, the exact moment the fridge door opens, she's there. Or even a crisp packet rustles from across the house... in she scurries.
The owners can’t explain it. It’s.. a miracle?
How do you find her?
Top Suspect of the Month:
Mabel
Age: 2
Charges: Selective Hearing
Mabel is medically deaf. Her owners know this because they've tried EVERYTHING to teach her the basic commands.
"Sit" - *blinks awkwardly*
"Come" - *not even a side eye of acknowledgment*
"Leave it" - *like you don't even exist*
What’s weird is apparently she's learnt to feel the... vibrations.... in the air instead?
Like, the exact moment the fridge door opens, she's there. Or even a crisp packet rustles from across the house... in she scurries.
The owners can’t explain it. It’s.. a miracle?
How do you find her?
Closed Investigations:
March 26
Frankie
Age: 7
Charges: Nosey Neighbour
Like most dogs, Frankie enjoys a spot of people watching.
The weird part? He REFUSES to take an interest unless the blinds are down??
Something about peeking through the slats—like your nan trying to catch a glimpse of the neighborhood drama—really gets him going.
He's giving nosey neighbor and it's seriously SUS
Voters found him..
FEBRUARY 26
Rosie
Age: 4
Charges: Not even trying to hide it
Rosie's favourite thing in the whole entire world is.. football.
Yep, you heard that right. She can kick and dribble with all 4 feet (and her snoot), and she'll pass the ball better than most of your Exes. She's not even trying to hide her inner hooman..
Swipe for the video evidence (it's damning).
Voters found her..
JANUARY 26
harvey
Age: 2.5
Charges: BUSTED in the act
Pawrents came home early, thought they'd surprise him. Clearly they weren't expected..
Harvey was caught sat *upright* on the couch, watching telly, with a bloody brew beside him.
I wish i was joking.
Voters found him..
DECEMBER 25
Jess
Age: 6
Charges: Sleeping Beauty
Jess sleeps like someone unplugged her, and when she wakes? It's like watching someone get factory reset in real time. Brain offline, face buffering. Like she's trying to load but got stuck at 34%
She wakes up with serious Monday Morning Energy.... and HOW does a dog know what a Monday morning is???
Voters found her..
Closed Investigations:
March 26
February 26
January 26
Frankie
Age: 7
Charges: Nosey Neighbour
Like most dogs, Frankie enjoys a spot of people watching.
The weird part? He REFUSES to take an interest unless the blinds are down?? Something about peeking through the slats—like your nan trying to catch a glimpse of the neighborhood drama—really gets him going.
He's giving nosey neighbor and it's seriously SUS
Voters found him..
Rosie
Age: 4
Charges: Not even trying to hide it
Rosie's favourite thing in the whole entire world is.. football.
Yep, you heard that right. She can kick and dribble with all 4 feet (and her snoot), and she'll pass the ball better than most of your Exes.She's not even trying to hide her inner hooman..
Swipe for the video evidence (it's damning)
Voters found her..
harvey
Age: 2.5
Charges: BUSTED in the act
Pawrents came home early, thought they'd surprise him. Clearly they weren't expected..
Harvey was caught sat *upright* on the couch, watching telly, with a bloody brew beside him.
I wish i was joking.
Voters found him..
December 25
November 25
Jess
Age: 6
Charges: Sleeping Beauty
Jess sleeps like someone unplugged her, and when she wakes? It's like watching someone get factory reset in real time. Brain offline, face buffering. Like she's trying to load but got stuck at 34%
She wakes up with serious Monday Morning Energy.... and HOW does a dog know what a Monday morning is???
Voters found her..
Ludo
Age: 8
Charges: We're not Egg-actly sure
Ludo doesn't have 'a thing', Ludo has a word.
"Eggs."
Whisper it seductively and he'll pull this face. Trouble is - is he smiling, or raging??
Have his fam ever fed him eggs? No. Has he ever SEEN an egg? Unclear. So what's with the beef? NOBODY KNOWS
Voters found him..
NoVEMBER 25
Ludo
Age: 8
Charges: We're not Egg-actly sure
Ludo doesn't have 'a thing', Ludo has a word.
"Eggs."
Whisper it seductively and he'll pull this face. Trouble is - is he smiling, or raging?? His fam have NO IDEA.
Have they ever fed him eggs? No. Has he ever SEEN an egg? Unclear.
So what's with the beef? NOBODY KNOWS
Voters found him..